happiness

How much do you love yourself?

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No that’s not a trick question.  Think about it before you answer, think really hard about how you feel about yourself.  Maybe the question is too broad, just think about today or yesterday.  How did you feel about yourself yesterday?  Did you love or hate yourself?

Isn’t it funny how the human psyche works?  During any given day I can go through an emotional rollercoaster of extreme love or extreme dislike for myself.  I wouldn’t say there are days I actually hate myself but there are definitely days I wish I was someone else.  Why is that?

Let’s start with your body image

I’ve struggled with my looks my entire life.  Sometimes I see pictures of myself in the past and I think WOW I look thin.  I know that our body changes as we get older and our metabolism at 35 is definitely not what it was at 25, but that doesn’t stop me from critiquing my body.

Some days I wake up and think “I love the way I look” and the very next day I can wish I had a totally different body.  We all know my body hasn’t changed drastically in 24 hours but something about my emotional mentality towards myself did.

Why can’t we just love who we are?

I wish this wasn’t the case.  I wish that I had a positive body image, but that’s not the case.  Why is this coming up now?  Well it’s been almost three months since I joined my gym and other than the four pounds I lost during the first month I have yet to lose any more weight.

I’m starting to think that maybe my body is just how it is and that’s the way it’s always going to be.  Could that be the case?  On one hand I think disliking things about myself leaves room for improvement, but on the other hand sometimes the emotions can be very overwhelming.

If so then I need to stop comparing myself to the Jennifer Aniston’s of the world and just start loving me for who I am and how I look.

Have you ever hated the way you act?

I know I have.  On any given day I can behave in a way that my mother would be ashamed.  As soon as something not-so-nice comes out of my mouth I instantly regret it, but by that time it’s too late.  I wish I didn’t have such a fly-off-the-handle temper but yet here we are.

Last week my boss and I had a meeting for my annual review.  After telling me how great my overall work has been during the last year she proceeded to ask me how I felt about the working group I was a part of.  I quickly explained that although my delivery was sometimes abrupt and unprofessional my intention was good as were my ideas.

She said “Oh so you know, that just made this conversation a whole lot easier.”  I replied “Of course I know, I’m not crazy.”  The way I act both at work and at home is sometimes not as I would like it to be, but isn’t that what makes us human?

I mean no one is perfect all the time so when we don’t like how we look or how we act why can’t we just give ourselves a break?

Photo from I’d Pin That

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