home ownership

Sh*t First-Time Homebuyers Say

  • Wait, so that monthly payment DOESN’T already included property taxes and insurance?
  • Property taxes and insurance are going to add FIVE-HUNDRED DOLLARS to my monthly payment?!
  • I love this house.
  • I can’t afford this house.
  • But I looooooove it.
  • I have to pay $10,000 in bank fees?!
  • No one ever told me about bank fees!
  • So, bank fees are the same as closing costs?
  • Okay, I totally knew about closing costs.
  • Buutttt, I don’t really want to pay them.
  • How do I get the seller to pay my closing costs?
  • How do I get the lender to waive my closing costs?
  • I can’t negotiate.
  • I can’t concentrate on anything else.
  • Do you want to drive by the house?
  • Do you want to drive by?
  • Let’s do a drive by.
  • Their furniture is awful.
  • Wallpaper?!
  • I could TOTALLY see myself in this houseeeeeee!!!
  • I can’t do it.  It’s too much money.
  • Let’s do a mock budget.
  • Okay, I feel better about our finances now.
  • Wait, no, I don’t.
  • But Dave Ramsey says…
  • It’s our dream house.
  • It’s just a little bit out of our price range.
  • Do you really think there is another interested buyer?
  • Is my real estate agent lying to me?
  • Is the lender lying to me?
  • Is the seller’s agent lying?!
  • WHO ISN’T LYING TO ME?!
  • I can’t do this.
  • Let’s rent forever.

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